13 dreams and 49 associations
– many more associations than dreams
– disappointment in hosts vs trying to please by following suggestions
– no direct mentioning of Covid-19, maybe indirectly: abundance; shrimps jumping, nature coming in.
– looking for giant fathers
– looking for the missed, longed for hug for mothers
– abandonment repeats itself but also a note around black and white and other opposites
– several mentions of the killing of George Floyd and its aftermath in the USA
– moving to a parallel word
Planning a trip. Looking at a map. Map turning into a matrix with different location points at each connection as a schedule.
Husband and I next to sea in restaurant. Open restaurant and people around. 3 or 4 very tall men (8ft). Who are these very tall men? Cross the road to get something there. Roll of black and white fabric. A lot. Carrying it. Walking back on beach to husband. Small body of water full of shrimps all jumping, in air. Everywhere. It felt like abundance of the fabric and shrimps.
Pair of finches, cardinals (birds), owls in the sea. Moving with the sea underneath the water.
Powerful association. Dream about the matrix. Thoughts been having around how my richest life right now is in this matrix. This is where my life is. Tall people and abundance. birds in the sea. Abundant life more real in dreams than in life.
Shrimp in water. Ocean churning up as these giants approach.
Two nights ago. Photo of father, he died two years ago. In dream not aware of his death. Feeling of confusion. Father smiling and very warm with open attitude in photo, very unlike him. In real life he was cold and had difficulty to connect to others. Where did he take this photo and how could he be so smiling and open?
Gave nephew small wooden boat. Nephew on husband’s side of family. Peter. Can’t ask for it back. Felt awkward. Father appeared in dream and was crying. He was upset with what the staff had been doing to upset his sleep. Distraught.
Convoluted association. I live by a Canal in London. Water birds. It is the time of the year when they have ducklings. 10 years living here. Saw different generations of families of birds. Sense of passage of time. Tall men. Chicago Bulls basketball team. Felt so long ago. Nostalgic.
Association with Chicago Bulls. Giants in the dreams. Last dance series on Netflix. Last season of playing together. All about Michael Jordan. Felt that he was so selfish with such big ego. Didn’t like him.
I was in Chicago when Bulls won their first series. Major jubilation. Reverie in contrast with what is going on in America right now.
Trying to go from UK to the continent. With official with Nazi-like uniform. Had to present paperwork to him. Had to provide references in order to get on ferry. Will paperwork be good enough? Something awful might happen.
Dream of few days ago. Worry. Front door off its hinges. Gap at the top. Many people trying to fix it. People holding it. Worry it will drop. Confused why this issue arose now. Time pressure to get the door fixed.
New York City subway to ‘mind the gap’.
In America we are off our hinges.
In dream of jumping shrimps there was no gap for the shrimps.
Association 9 and Dream 8
Association with shrimps. Dream of great chest freezer dreams full of shrimps and ice cream and abundance.
Dream with pair of birds. Noah’s Ark to escape to an alternative world. Those couples to survive away from this world into another world. Association of doors opening into parallel world where we would all like to be now with our twin figures.
Saw self as teenager. Guru (woman) from the east coming to school to give very important presentation. Every child gets a hug from the guru. My turn, third from last in line, she stops hugging and I don’t get a hug.
Abundance. My association with abundance of food. Abundance of life. Birds, Mallards etc. Pre-occupied with walking along the river. Monday and things have changed in the UK with being able to meet people again.
Abundance of us. Humans. So many of us.
Not wanting to drink the own cup of tea.
Feeling of bewilderment. Unusual, confused, suspended, anxious. Boats in water in streams. Unusual attitude of father. Abundance. Feeling excess vs deficit. Sometimes excessive things are also a problem.
Struck by the idea of abundance that followed silence. Found silence helpful. Helped to get into touch with feelings. Abundance. Took delivery of food boxes from NHS that I don’t need. Think of families who had to live off this box of food for a week. How little abundance there is for many many people at the moment. A foretaste of what might be coming?
Invited by friends to go to house and join them. Assumed it was for dinner or to enjoy summer weather. Arrived: outside of house very beautiful. Fountain in front. Friend greets at door. Instantly there is no bone structure to the house. Walk across a balance beam, to get to a place to actually stand. Lots of friends with construction tools in bare bones of the house and don’t know what to do. Should be building but don’t what to do. Walked to back of the house. Room with group of people sitting in a circle with different uniforms. What are you all doing? Wallpaper of George Floyd’s face all over the room. Circle of people and nobody is responding to each other.
Last week – realisation of house being symbol of psyche and the personal realisation that he had no house – house was ravaged. Nothing to construct. Abundance triggering association of set of lights in America I can’t read. Incident unravel abundance of rage and discrimination that has been sitting in America forever.
Abandoned big white dog. Lose a lot of hair. Friend brings dog into home with him. Discussion in house with his girlfriend and another girl. Other girl didn’t want that dog in the house.
Image in the dream waiting for your turn for the hug and not getting your turn.
Giants, tall men. Redwood trees in my mind.
Hug. Overwhelming sadness about contact with other people and how even though we can open up and see people, contact and connection is difficult. Envious of animals in water who can be close to each other.
Association with redwood trees. Emily Carr’s paintings of trees.
Abandoned dog. Local zoo. No income, all animals abandoned and starving. Feeding expensive. Sacrifice animals. No abundance for them.
Magnets. Move, they can work independently and interdependently. Dog. Neighbour found dog and rescued the dog.
Animals. Humans are like animals. Mauritius island. Big bird Dodo destroyed by European conquerors. We have been the virus for the Dodo.
Pairs of birds and the magnets. Two poles of the magnet. Abundance and abandonment.
Guru coming to school. Indian lady named Anand meaning joy and happiness. Abundance connected with hesitation I felt in coming into the matrix. Feeling overwhelmed – too much to take in. Rich but the lack and grief and loss and confusion is overwhelming.
Dream of black and white roll of fabric. Closeness to what is being rolled out in America this past week. The tall men and the pygmy shrimps and the inequities and scarcity and how do we cross over to the other side.
Raised by ??? in Milan. When she gave me hugs I felt connected with own inner spirit. (Couldn’t hear properly)
Image of homeless unwanted dog.
Hugging. Bringing to mind mom who passed on to other side ten years ago. Hugged her when she came back from school. We were a hugging family. I miss that.
Hugs. Week or two ago. Friend got a new boat. On lake Champagne in Vermont. Like the virus didn’t exist. Forgot about the virus and gave my friend a huge hug. We were shocked, half laughing and half aghast.
Went for walk with friend with cancer. Three dogs who was abandoned. She hugged me in the end and we had the same reaction as above. I was so apologetic.
Hug. Story about famous American football player at hardware store. Checking out. Elderly white lady was sobbing. Said to him: Sorry about what is happening, can I give you a hug? Risk to old woman giving a hug despite the virus.
Dog. Article saying that during the pandemic, for companionship reasons many people adopted dogs for families. Many of those dogs could be abandoned when people become busy again without time to look after the dogs. What we do during the pandemic and what we will abandon afterwards.
French philosopher said dogs were viruses. Imagine viruses talking to themselves and saying that poor humans cannot socialise but we can socialise and reproduce.
Intimacy. Article in UK today. About intimate relations with persons not in household. Intimacy, closeness. Mourning – abundance and deficit.
Abandoned dog and zoo animals in contrast to nature that benefits by being left alone by humans.
Held up with large roots of u-tree. Someone takes photos where my skin touches the skin of the u-tree. Marriage to the earth. Intimacy we can have with the ground and fruits and plants.
Large shrimps. Prawns. Pawns. Chess set. What moves the pawns? Powerful or powerless?
Was in friend’s house. Hand-painted T-shirts of pop icons. When I got there he didn’t have any more t-shirts. But he had metal toy cars. Melted them to make a big stick of melted toy cars. Was attracted to that piece but looked at the union of the cars – looked very disturbing because he destroyed the cars to stick them together.
Rudyard Kipling’s poem “If” first two lines.
“If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,”
Filled with sadness and mourning – how to stop abandoning each other? Will we be able to build something like these metal cars?
Toy cars, shrimps, miners and minors.
Dogs. Trump’s threats to turn police dogs on protesters. Leaders cannot be trusted. No-one looking after us or thinking about us. What we may need.
Parallel universe. Space X flights and the pairs of birds and pairs of astronauts.
Robotic. Other languages and life forms and communication.
Having lunch with brother and sister and parents. Atmosphere was terrible. Couldn’t wait for parents to leave. Wish to redo lunch without parents and with a good atmosphere.
Good association leaving nature alone to foster. We might benefit from being left alone sometime.
Graffiti in Boston: Before trying harder, stop completely.
Boat with pull back before it can be released?
Just be. Be still. Be outside. Be inside.
- Opposing forces. Scarcity and abundance.
- Dichotomy between doing nothing and hugging.
- Giant men and fathers. Stern father. Father’s boat. Guru – thought it was a man. Then it was a woman. Longing for the maternal embrace. Missed hug. Symbol of this period.
- Generational divide. Younger generation haven’t created what they have inherited from us.
- Quite long silence: felt like theme. More welcomed silence. Naming the silence spoiled it.
- Tall men. Guru. Is there longing for parental figures to come to our rescue. Projecting dynamic between us and parents unto others.
- Space for dreams shut out. Tried to speak but muted. ‘Parents’ of the matrix not sufficient?
- Boundaries felt fluid.
- Abundance of associations vs dreams. Easier to associate than to share. Generosity being tested.
- How do we hug these polarities?
- How to find balance?
Blog compiled by David Armstrong, Jean Cooper and Mira Erlich-Ginor
Image: Responsibility by Juliet Scott, 2019
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